Looking for Meaning in All the Wrong Places
I continue reflecting on career, life, and the choices that shape each, because I know I’m touching on something common to many of my readers. Several people feel swept up in the current of the work/life river as it winds its way past the rocks and trees we call years. What should I do for a living? What should I major in? To what jobs and companies should I apply? What skills do I need? What is the next step?
All of these questions are valid and important. But, overshadowing them is what should be the central question of our lives: Who do I want to be? In this question, we’re dealing with a legacy, and not with a resume. In this question, we’re dealing with the content of our being, and not the content of our bank account. In this question, we answer both the central question of our childhood (What do I want to be when I grow up?) and the central question of our adulthood (What’s the point of all this?).
And when we speak of legacy, we’re speaking about something deeper than fame or celebrity status. We’re talking about what those closest to us, those who care about us most, and those we care about most, think. We can read bios of the rich and famous for hours; we remember the impact of a teacher, coach, minister, grandparent, or mentor for a lifetime.
Too often we can easily get caught up in the mindset we’re sold in Super Bowl commercials: life is meaningless until you have a lot of stuff. We’re led to believe that filling our house with things will fill our lives with meaning. We buy into the notion that someone somewhere is keeping score, and if we don’t have our portfolio correctly diversified, or if our big screen isn’t big enough, or if it’s been three years since our last promotion, then we’re falling behind. We feel like we have to catch up, and time is running out. Decisions need to me made fast. And so we make decisions like we were employees in a bank, and not as if we were masters of our own legacies and humble members of families and communities.
When we begin to search for meaning in a job, we chase our own tails. The satisfaction and delight that comes from rightly relating to your family or community has a feeling of finality and rest to it. The best families and communities love unconditionally, encourage incessantly, and live intimately. When we discover the sweet relief that comes from being a part of such a family, we find our meaning and our happiness. When we are greeted with the meaning that comes from belonging to such a community, we feel that we can let our hair down, take a load off, and just rest.
The daily grind has no finish line. Conversely, there is no better destination than the open arms of someone who loves you. Choose wisely, for you are shaping your own destiny, carving your own path, and living your own legacy.
All of these questions are valid and important. But, overshadowing them is what should be the central question of our lives: Who do I want to be? In this question, we’re dealing with a legacy, and not with a resume. In this question, we’re dealing with the content of our being, and not the content of our bank account. In this question, we answer both the central question of our childhood (What do I want to be when I grow up?) and the central question of our adulthood (What’s the point of all this?).
And when we speak of legacy, we’re speaking about something deeper than fame or celebrity status. We’re talking about what those closest to us, those who care about us most, and those we care about most, think. We can read bios of the rich and famous for hours; we remember the impact of a teacher, coach, minister, grandparent, or mentor for a lifetime.
Too often we can easily get caught up in the mindset we’re sold in Super Bowl commercials: life is meaningless until you have a lot of stuff. We’re led to believe that filling our house with things will fill our lives with meaning. We buy into the notion that someone somewhere is keeping score, and if we don’t have our portfolio correctly diversified, or if our big screen isn’t big enough, or if it’s been three years since our last promotion, then we’re falling behind. We feel like we have to catch up, and time is running out. Decisions need to me made fast. And so we make decisions like we were employees in a bank, and not as if we were masters of our own legacies and humble members of families and communities.
When we begin to search for meaning in a job, we chase our own tails. The satisfaction and delight that comes from rightly relating to your family or community has a feeling of finality and rest to it. The best families and communities love unconditionally, encourage incessantly, and live intimately. When we discover the sweet relief that comes from being a part of such a family, we find our meaning and our happiness. When we are greeted with the meaning that comes from belonging to such a community, we feel that we can let our hair down, take a load off, and just rest.
The daily grind has no finish line. Conversely, there is no better destination than the open arms of someone who loves you. Choose wisely, for you are shaping your own destiny, carving your own path, and living your own legacy.
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Comments (2)
8:35 AM
Life is a marathon, not a sprint.
8:48 PM
indeed, Dad.
BTW, thanks for the doughnuts in Tampa!
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